A story for sexually frustrated men
My friend was seriously unhappy.
He never said anything about his unhappiness. He never complained. But, I could see the hurt, anger, and frustration that seethed and stewed inside of him. It was all there below the surface.
Try though he might, he couldnt hide the unhappy story that was etched into his face and eyes the story of Im doing everything Im supposed to do but what I want isnt coming back to me.
Because I cared about my friend, I asked him to go riding with me. As I pointed my car down a scenic highway, we just rode in silence my friend wrapped up in the turmoil of his thoughts. After several miles, with tears in his eyes, he finally broke and unloaded on me. Heres what he said
My problem is that my wife is never in the mood. Its been years since she initiated sex. And, when I finally get past all of her sexual avoidance tactics, she just lays there like a lump of coal, no emotion, no kissing, and no movement of any kind. I feel like I am raping her. At that point, I am so furious and frustrated that I would rather just stop and finish myself off. But, the feelings of humiliation from that are even worse.
And, I dont get it. On my end, Im doing everything Im supposed to do. Im a good provider for her and our children. I take time to talk with her and I listen to what she has to say we even have dinner together almost every day. We have a nice home, she drives a nice car you would think I would get something coming back to me, wouldnt you? And yes, she takes good care of our kids and thats the problem, she takes good care of everything and everyone except me.
I tell you, after years of her lack of interest in sex, Im to the point that I feel nothing but hatred towards her. Im fed up with being sexually needy. Im sick and tired of getting the cold-shoulder. Im through with being made to feel like Im some kind of pervert just because I have sexual needs.
I used to love her with everything thats in me and maybe theres still a little love buried down deep somewhere but right now the flame is gone and all thats left is bitter resentment.
And you know whats most frustrating of all? I know it used to be in her. When we were first married, she was great. Now its like her sexual interest is completely gone died out and its killing me too.
As you can tell from the story, my friend believed that he was fully meeting the needs of his wife but his wife was not meeting his needs in return and as you know, unhappiness is exactly equal to expectations unfulfilled.
But now, let me tell you what was really going on and check to see if this is the case with you. Because my friend was not meeting the most important needs of his wife, he had literally and physically turned off her sexual faucet and he didnt even realize it.
Yes, it was true that he was meeting some of her basic financial and security needs. But thats not at all the same thing as meeting her needs in a way fires up her sexual engine. Its not the same thing at all.
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